Detrimental effect of being “right”

Which would you rather be, happy or right?
In hindsight, I can say that there is little correlation between the two – and if there were to be any correlation at all, I believe it to be negative.

Many times, when we assert our opinions and views in the hopes of proving someone wrong, we ultimately damage ourselves. This desire to be right causes both parties to become increasingly more defensive, and often results in bitterness and alienation.

When I get corrected by someone, I do not respond with, “Golly gee willikers! Thank you for proving to me that you are right and that I am wrong. You are so smart, and I appreciate your wisdom and friendship”. On the other hand, what I do think is, “Gosh, you are a narcissistic prick. If I never talked to you again, I would not complain”.

To be listened to and respected is an innate desire for all mankind. Those who listen are typically loved, warmly welcomed, and appreciated. Those who assert corrections are often resented, avoided and alienated.

Giving up the glory

We are attention whores.
We consistently interrupt people in their storytelling process to broadcast and demonstrate that our lives are far more important and worthy of the audience’s time. We strive to satisfy this desire of knowing that our accomplishments and experiences are superior to our peers. But this is detrimental.

We do not benefit in anyway from robbing someone of their moment of glory – in fact, we come off as unappealing narcissistic morons. Ironically, when we surrender our need to hog the glory, the attention we used to need is replaced by a quiet and magical inner confidence that descends from letting people have their deserved glory.

Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff

Change the things that can be changed, accept the things that cannot, and have the wisdom to know the difference.

Do Something Nice for Someone Else – and Don’t Tell Anyone About it

When we perform acts of kindness, almost always we boast of our actions. This is because we want something in return. We seek their approval, recognition, and compliments.

We want to hear that we are nice, and that we are thoughtful…but does this stem from insecurities of our own kindness? We seek approval of the things that we aren’t and strive to be. We don’t seek affirmation of the traits that we confidently are.